Hello world. It's been 9 weeks since we've last communicated and let me tell you a lot has changed. When we left off last time, that "baby" was on her way. Now, I'm all for the miracle of birth, but when the humans left, they didn't come back for 3 days! Thankfully Grandma came to feed me, but only twice a day.
The humans have been talking non stop about this "baby" and I have since learned her name to be Claire. I approve. Now, I wasn't exactly on board with the decision to bring another mouth to feed into our happy little family at first, but Claire has grown on me a little. We've even learned to play together.
Hey, I'm not saying that I'm not going to turn her into my food slave as soon as I teach her to walk, I'm just saying we're getting along for now.
So I learned in the last week that Claire went to the doctor for a 2 month checkup and was told she weighs 10.64 pounds and is 22 inches long now. That means she's gained over 3 pounds and 3 inches since she was born. I went to the doctor this week too, and I LOST 3 pounds, but you don't hear the female screaming that from the rooftops. I feel cheated.
They feed her all the time. She's working the system somehow and hasn't let me in on her secret just yet. I'm going to figure it out sooner or later. The humans seem to think that Claire is talking to them or something, but all I hear come out of her mouth are "ooooo's" and "ahhhh's."
I'll continue to update cyberspace on developments here as they happen, but for now I'm going to do a quick google search on mind control to teach Claire how to manipulate the humans into feeding me more.
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